Presence Over Permission
She didn’t even realize she’d been holding her breath. Not until she was back in her car, doors locked, engine running—safe.
That meeting had drained her. Not because she didn’t belong, but because she’d spent the whole time convincing herself that she did. Speaking softer than she wanted to. Making herself smaller by crossing, crossing and re-crossing her legs. Nodding when she should’ve pushed back.
If you’ve ever walked out of a room feeling more insignificant than when you walked in, you know the ache I’m talking about.
What if I told you there was a way to condition ourselves to take command of our own presence? That it was possible to walk into that same meeting and not a single person would question that you belong there—including you?
Let’s dive into the steps necessary so that anyone can learn to own her space.
Command Isn’t Given—It’s Taken
No one hands you authority just for showing up. If you don’t believe you belong in the space—whether it’s a boardroom, a training bay, or a public setting—no one else will either.
Owning your space means being present, alert, and unapologetically aware. Confidence isn’t loud; it’s a quiet command that comes through in how you stand, how you scan, and how you carry yourself when it counts.
If you’re feeling uneasy about walking into that meeting, don’t just brush it off—interrogate it. Get brutally honest with yourself. Are you underprepared? Lacking experience? Anxious about that one combative coworker or your micromanaging boss?
Whatever it is, name it. That’s your intel. And intel is power.
If you’re light on knowledge, hit the books. If experience is thin, lean into the strengths you do have—adaptability, instinct, or related skills that still count.
And remember: not every moment requires you to chime in. Confidence is also knowing when your silence carries more weight than forced words.
Commanding Presence: Your Body Speaks Before You Do
Before you say a single word, your body has already delivered a message. Confidence is communicated through posture, movement, and eye contact. You don’t need to strut into every room like you’re in a power suit commercial, but you do need to be intentional.
- Stand up straight. Shoulders back, chin up—not rigid, but ready. Not apologizing for being there.
- Take up space. Stop shrinking yourself. Spread out your materials at the table. Plant your feet when you speak. Sit with presence, not hesitation.
- Hold eye contact. Not in a stare-down way, but in a way that says “I see you, and I expect to be seen too.”
- Control your hands. Fidgeting, tugging at your clothes, hiding your hands in your sleeves—it all signals doubt. Use purposeful gestures when you speak or rest your hands calmly in front of you.
Think about the woman who walks into a room and doesn’t flinch when heads turn. She’s not trying to prove anything. She already knows she belongs. And when it comes to situational awareness, this same presence applies—scanning your environment, staying alert, walking like you’ve got a mission, and being ready to act if needed.
Your Voice Is a Weapon. Use It Well.
We’ve been conditioned to soften our tone, end sentences like questions, and pad everything we say with “just” or “I think.” Stop. A woman who owns her space doesn’t apologize for speaking. She doesn’t mumble. She doesn’t fidget with her words. She commands.
Here’s how to tighten up your verbal presence:
- Drop the fillers. “Just,” “maybe,” “I could be wrong, but…” —cut them. Speak clearly and with direction.
- Lower your register. High-pitched nervousness doesn’t inspire trust. Breathe. Speak from your chest.
- Project. You don’t have to shout, but your voice should carry. Don’t make people lean in to hear you—make them want to.
- Practice assertive phrases. In moments where you need authority, keep it simple:
- “I need you to back up.”
- “This isn’t up for discussion.”
- “That’s not going to work for me.”
- “Step aside.”
Whether you’re leading a team meeting or confronting an uncomfortable stranger, your voice sets the tone for how you expect to be treated.
In high-stakes scenarios, your words may be the first and last chance to change the outcome. Train your voice to show calm authority—not panic.
Up next: Want to sound like a woman who owns her space? Let’s talk about practice—because no one becomes articulate under pressure by accident.
Practice Like You Mean It
You don’t magically become composed in a high-pressure moment. You don’t suddenly speak with conviction when your heart’s racing and your brain is scrambling. That kind of poise is built—through repetition, reflection, and deliberate practice.
Start here:
- Speak out loud when you’re alone. No, seriously. Practice saying what you wish you’d said in that meeting. Run through how you’d respond if someone got too close in the parking lot. Use your full voice. Train your tone, your pacing, and your posture.
- Record yourself. You’ll notice nervous tics you didn’t realize you had. Do you trail off? Do you over-explain? Are you shrinking into your words? Don’t beat yourself up—just refine it.
- Role-play uncomfortable scenarios. Not just with attackers—but with your manager, your mother-in-law, or the know-it-all guy at the range. Practice standing your ground without being combative.
This isn’t about being theatrical—it’s about being ready.
Owning your space isn’t a one-time decision. It’s a skill.
And like every skill, it sharpens with use. You don’t want the first time you speak with confidence to be when it matters most. You want it to be the hundredth.
So talk. Practice. Prepare. Because one day, the woman who once second-guessed her voice will be the one everyone listens to.
Tired of shrinking yourself to make others comfortable?
We see it all the time—smart, capable women whispering instead of leading, hesitating instead of moving. But not here. At WGOAA, we train women to shoot straight, speak clearly, and take up the damn space they’ve earned. No more waiting for permission. No more playing small.
🔥 Join the only community built for women who are done being quiet and ready to own every room, every range, and every right.
