Presence Over Permission
She didnโt even realize sheโd been holding her breath. Not until she was back in her car, doors locked, engine runningโsafe.
That meeting had drained her. Not because she didnโt belong, but because sheโd spent the whole time convincing herself that she did. Speaking softer than she wanted to. Making herself smaller by crossing, crossing and re-crossing her legs. Nodding when she shouldโve pushed back.
If youโve ever walked out of a room feeling more insignificant than when you walked in, you know the ache Iโm talking about.
What if I told you there was a way to condition ourselves to take command of our own presence? That it was possible to walk into that same meeting and not a single person would question that you belong thereโincluding you?
Letโs dive into the steps necessary so that anyone can learn to own her space.
Command Isnโt GivenโItโs Taken
No one hands you authority just for showing up. If you donโt believe you belong in the spaceโwhether itโs a boardroom, a training bay, or a public settingโno one else will either.
Owning your space means being present, alert, and unapologetically aware. Confidence isnโt loud; itโs a quiet command that comes through in how you stand, how you scan, and how you carry yourself when it counts.
If youโre feeling uneasy about walking into that meeting, donโt just brush it offโinterrogate it. Get brutally honest with yourself. Are you underprepared? Lacking experience? Anxious about that one combative coworker or your micromanaging boss?
Whatever it is, name it. Thatโs your intel. And intel is power.
If youโre light on knowledge, hit the books. If experience is thin, lean into the strengths you do haveโadaptability, instinct, or related skills that still count.
And remember: not every moment requires you to chime in. Confidence is also knowing when your silence carries more weight than forced words.
Commanding Presence: Your Body Speaks Before You Do
Before you say a single word, your body has already delivered a message. Confidence is communicated through posture, movement, and eye contact. You donโt need to strut into every room like youโre in a power suit commercial, but you do need to be intentional.
- Stand up straight. Shoulders back, chin upโnot rigid, but ready. Not apologizing for being there.
- Take up space. Stop shrinking yourself. Spread out your materials at the table. Plant your feet when you speak. Sit with presence, not hesitation.
- Hold eye contact. Not in a stare-down way, but in a way that says โI see you, and I expect to be seen too.โ
- Control your hands. Fidgeting, tugging at your clothes, hiding your hands in your sleevesโit all signals doubt. Use purposeful gestures when you speak or rest your hands calmly in front of you.
Think about the woman who walks into a room and doesnโt flinch when heads turn. Sheโs not trying to prove anything. She already knows she belongs. And when it comes to situational awareness, this same presence appliesโscanning your environment, staying alert, walking like youโve got a mission, and being ready to act if needed.
Your Voice Is a Weapon. Use It Well.
Weโve been conditioned to soften our tone, end sentences like questions, and pad everything we say with โjustโ or โI think.โ Stop. A woman who owns her space doesnโt apologize for speaking. She doesnโt mumble. She doesnโt fidget with her words. She commands.
Hereโs how to tighten up your verbal presence:
- Drop the fillers. โJust,โ โmaybe,โ โI could be wrong, butโฆโ โcut them. Speak clearly and with direction.
- Lower your register. High-pitched nervousness doesnโt inspire trust. Breathe. Speak from your chest.
- Project. You donโt have to shout, but your voice should carry. Donโt make people lean in to hear youโmake them want to.
- Practice assertive phrases. In moments where you need authority, keep it simple:
- โI need you to back up.โ
- โThis isnโt up for discussion.โ
- โThatโs not going to work for me.โ
- โStep aside.โ
Whether you’re leading a team meeting or confronting an uncomfortable stranger, your voice sets the tone for how you expect to be treated.
In high-stakes scenarios, your words may be the first and last chance to change the outcome. Train your voice to show calm authorityโnot panic.
Up next: Want to sound like a woman who owns her space? Letโs talk about practiceโbecause no one becomes articulate under pressure by accident.
Practice Like You Mean It
You donโt magically become composed in a high-pressure moment. You donโt suddenly speak with conviction when your heartโs racing and your brain is scrambling. That kind of poise is builtโthrough repetition, reflection, and deliberate practice.
Start here:
- Speak out loud when youโre alone. No, seriously. Practice saying what you wish youโd said in that meeting. Run through how youโd respond if someone got too close in the parking lot. Use your full voice. Train your tone, your pacing, and your posture.
- Record yourself. Youโll notice nervous tics you didnโt realize you had. Do you trail off? Do you over-explain? Are you shrinking into your words? Donโt beat yourself upโjust refine it.
- Role-play uncomfortable scenarios. Not just with attackersโbut with your manager, your mother-in-law, or the know-it-all guy at the range. Practice standing your ground without being combative.
This isnโt about being theatricalโitโs about being ready.
Owning your space isnโt a one-time decision. Itโs a skill.
And like every skill, it sharpens with use. You donโt want the first time you speak with confidence to be when it matters most. You want it to be the hundredth.
So talk. Practice. Prepare. Because one day, the woman who once second-guessed her voice will be the one everyone listens to.
Tired of shrinking yourself to make others comfortable?
ย We see it all the timeโsmart, capable women whispering instead of leading, hesitating instead of moving. But not here. At WGOAA, we train women to shoot straight, speak clearly, and take up the damn space theyโve earned. No more waiting for permission. No more playing small.
๐ฅ Join the only community built for women who are done being quiet and ready to own every room, every range, and every right.
